The one where I make your sex life better

Sex is supposed to be fun and euphoric, so when it's barely satisfactory you're left wondering why.

Studies have continuously shown that great sex does wonders for your emotional, physical and mental health. An orgasm releases a shit load of oxytocin, a hormone that is known to have a positive impact on your mood and emotions, so basically; a happy sex life = a happier and healthier life.

If you're not reaping those benefits then it probably means you're not entirely satisfied with the sex you've been having. It doesn't mean that you're "bad" at sex or the person you're sleeping with is, and if it's your partner you're having just 'ok' sex with, it doesn't mean you're not meant for each other.

Whatever the actual reason may be for the unsatisfactory sex it can probably be fixed, and you can start by applying my 7 tips to take your sex life from 'ok' to orgasmic. Many people fail to reach the full potential of a great sex life, but I don't want you to be one of those people!

Explore & Experiment

If you don't know what makes you tick, how can you expect someone else to?

Carve out some alone time for yourself and make sure that you won't be disturbed. If you're not already in the mood, try putting some sexy lingerie on for yourself, maybe try lighting some candles or putting on some music.

And then when you're ready, it's time to explore & experiment to find what works for you and helps you achieve maximum orgasm. Try different positions and toys to really see what works and most importantly - just have fun!

If you're a sex toy beginner I'd strongly recommend starting with a simple bullet vibrator, the Durex Intense Delight Bullet being a personal favourite. Mini vibrating bullets are the perfect starter toy - easy to handle and not intimidating for beginners.

From there just have a little shop around for more toys that take your fancy. I personally like to treat myself to something new from LoveHoney every couple of months. Just remember to read the descriptions and reviews before you buy to make sure it's what you're looking for.

Extra tip: When you get to the checkout and it asks you if you want to add lube and cleaning solutions for your toys, you'll probably think "no I won't need them", trust me you do and they're definitely worth paying extra for.

Know Your Kinks

If you say you don't have kinks, I'm sorry to break it to you but you're either lying to me or you're lying to yourself. The words "kink" or "fetish" come with such a weird stigma within society that I just don't understand. It's completely normal to have kinks/fetishes/turn ons. Kinks can range from something like spanking and calling him daddy to role-playing or orgasm control.

Ask the person or people you're sexually active with what their kinks are, and you share yours with them. You'd be surprised how many of them have the same ones or how many of theirs you want to try too.

They're your kinks for a reason - they get you excited. So do them, and I promise your sex life will take an amazing turn.

Communication is Key

Babe, listen to me, please stop faking your orgasms and acting like the sex is great when it's not.

Faking it doesn't help them and it certainly doesn't help you.

Communicate!

If you're comfortable enough to get naked infront of them, you should be comfortable enough to tell them what you want and how you want it.

Don't get me twisted, I'm not telling you to criticise them and tell them that they're doing a terrible job, because the fact is, everyone is different so what they're doing with you may have made their last partners toes curl.

If you want to change to a position that you know will help them reach your g-spot, tell them. If you're loving what they're doing but they have a habit of changing up their rhythm too quick, tell them not to stop.

It ultimately all comes down to communication - they don't know they're not doing it right unless you tell them.

Lubricate

No matter how horny someone is, sometimes a vagina's natural lubrication just isn't enough. Natural dryness, even when you're in the mood, is completely normal and common for any age. So let's throw away the idea that having to use lube is a bad thing - it's not!

In fact lube, even if you don't need it, can take the feeling to a whole other level for the both of you.

If your natural lubrication isn't enough and you're not using lube, it's just painful, uncomfortable and simply not enjoyable. Please stop putting yourself through the literal pain of having dry sex and use some water-based lube!

Build The Anticipation

The anticipation before sex can sometimes be as fun and exciting as the act itself, especially if you're in a relationship and the sex is just becoming a little too boring lately.

Sexting is an art that everyone is capable of perfecting. What does the other person like? Know that and you'll know exactly what you need to say to drive them wild.

Send them pictures and messages throughout the day as sneak peeks of what's about to come and I'm pretty sure they'll be set to rip your clothes off the second you walk through the door.

Sensual Massage

If your sex life has took a hit lately because you just haven't been in the mood, maybe because you've been working a lot or your kids have been driving you insane, then I fully recommend a sensual full body massage.

Make sure the two of you won't be interrupted, light some candles, get the oils out and give each other a relaxing massage. Guaranteed to rebuild the intimacy and set you up for an intense, sensual night.

Switch Up The Location

Sometimes sex can simply become repetitive if you're always doing it in the same bed. Go to another room or join them in the shower - something as simple as that can surprisingly make things much more exciting for both of you.

If you want to get out of the house completely, hotel sex can be really fucking fun.

Or if the slightest chance of being caught is a kink then why not take it outside.

Get in tune with your body and desires and you're bound to turn your ok sex life into a stream of orgasms! Now go have fun babes!

With love, Han

xo

If you love erotic bedroom art, check out our collection over on Hanbelles Designs